Is the Laptop a Misnomer?

Why laptop? I can think of better names for things...

Lollypop = sugarlick toothrot. Towel = absorbent bacteria trap

Get it? Ok maybe not so good but I genuinely challenge the word laptop.

In my professional dealings (this week, anyway), the single most regrettably named object I use daily is the LAPTOP. Why? Because...

1. having this computer on your lap is a most uncomfortable thing,


2. its heat producing, usually metallic and flat


3. neck wrenching, below eye level, and the most


4. arm tiring device ever conceived, in this position.

Now for me it is one device I am rarely without. Its my office and my typewriter and my connection with most things I do daily. Its a miracle of our times.

Never has it been on my lap for more than a desperate 20 mins, either.

Its not a Laptop, its a Portable Computer.

It is light and portable. But when I am deeply in work mode, here are my best tips for typing up a demonic storm of productivity:

1. Plug it in to POWER: a basic thing so as not to be disturbed by false promises of "700 days worth of battery life" .... yeah right. This also allows you to do the next good thing, plug in extensions...


2. Connect a monitor at EYE LEVEL. Try two... amazing stuff. By all means use its own screen, but if thats the case raise it up on a platform. Or try a monitor up high and it below with the existing keyboard.


3. TWO INPUT DEVICES: my own patented idea of the century is to sell a mouse with a trackpad, or a track ball and track pad, LEFT AND RIGHT. This balances posture and keeps both sides of your brain communicating. If I was in business, I'd sell a lefty and righty mouse... hmmm. Its easy enough to do, and I use this system already.


4. SHIFT THE LIGHT from BLUE to RED using a program like "Iris"